November 7, 2012

Learning the difference between Victim Surrender + Divine Surrender

This past week, with the tragedy of Sandy taking over the East Coast and uprooting my loved ones from their homes, I heard so many of my friends (myself included, of course) say that they are “control freaks” and that letting go is not something that comes easy. This can be a conversation about letting go of the fact that they missed yoga that morning to letting go of the fact that the relationship they adored had to end or even something as challenging as letting go of your home being torn apart by a traumatizing hurricane.  I have seen this come up in my life more and more over the past few years but this summer I got hit with the biggest lesson of letting go that I have ever experienced.  For so long I pushed harder, cried harder, loved harder and some times even yelled harder then I have ever done in my life but nothing I tried was working.  When I was finally over a year deep in to forcing my own outcome and my own agenda, I pretty much had a melt down.  I couldn’t push, yell or even love anymore.  My soul, my spirit, even my body were so DONE.

When you come across a situation that can’t possibly work out the way you had hoped, it can create a shock to your soul that has the potential to last an entire life time. I invite you to choose a different path beauties. I invite you to choose the path of divine surrender.  I say divine surrender specifically because I’m not talking about letting go and feeling like a victim. I don’t mean that you let go and curse the man who participated in your heartache, or wish evil on the boss that let you go. I mean that you get down on your knees and ask God to help you understand.  Ask for forgiveness for whatever part you played, even if you don’t think you did a single thing wrong, because true healing only comes from allowing ourselves to be vulnerable enough that we take responsibility for our actions. Divine surrender means that you send love and peace to the situation or person that you are choosing to let go, not cling on in the intensely desperate hopes of a different outcome.  Notice I didn’t say that this is a walk in the park. It’s not. But I truly believe that this is one of life’s greatest lessons and once we master it, we will find it to also be one of our greatest lessons in healing our mind, body and soul.  Allow yourself to be messy with it, get confused, discover hidden truths and cry as much as you need to.  Some times that is all we can do love, and the more you push and protest, the more disease and imbalance you will be surrounded by.

Whatever it is that you are struggling to let go of, leave a comment below and either let me know what’s going on so I can hold space for it, or declare that you are ready to let go of it. Wherever you are Beauties there is NO judgment. As I always say, we are in this together and together we will heal.

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  • Kumar Gauraw

    Hello Nitika,
    I happened to visit your website through our Twitter connection. Thank you for the follow.

    I am amaze to see your life story and I must say, you’ve had a challenging life since early on and therefore you’re a source of inspiration.

    Thank you for adding value to the world through your initiative.

    • Nitika Chopra

      This is so thoughtful of you Kumar, thank you so much! I look forward to seeing more of your comments on Bella Life and connecting with you more online. Have a beautiful night <3



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